Youth Sports: Parents Out of Control

Youth Sports is support to be fun. Some parents are getting out of control. The benefits of sports out weights the negative aspects of sport. But, some parents are losing control. Sports are for the kids, not the parents.

Are you a parent in control of your behavior at a youth sporting event?

This YouTube video asks the right questions:

Youth Sports: Prventing Burnout

Preventing Youth Sport Burnout
By Susan E. Stoker

Sport is not only physically challenging, but it can also be mentally challenging. Criticism from coaches, parents, and other teammates, as well as pressure to win can create an excessive amount of anxiety or stress for young athletes. Stress can be physical, emotional, or psychological, and research has indicated that it can lead to burnout. Burnout has been described as dropping/quitting of an activity that was at one time enjoyable.

The early years of development are critical years for learning about oneself. The sport setting is one where valuable experiences can take place. Young athletes can, for example, learn how to cooperate with others, make friends, and gain other social skills that will be used throughout their lives. Coaches and parents should be aware, at all times, that their feedback to youngsters can greatly effect their children. Youngsters may take their parents' and coaches' criticisms to heart and find a flaw in themselves.

Coaches and parents should also be cautious that youth sport participation does not become work for children. The outcome of the game should not be more important than the process of learning the sport and other life lessons. In today's youth sport setting, young athletes may be worrying more about who will win instead of enjoying themselves and the sport. Following a game, many parents and coaches focus on the outcome and find fault with youngsters' performances. Positive reinforcement should be provided regardless of the outcome. Research indicates that positive reinforcement motivates and has a greater effect on learning than criticism. Again, criticism can create high levels of stress, which can lead to burnout.

Coaches should know more about their sport than teaching skills, conditioning, or basic first aid. Knowledge concerning the psychological aspect of coaching, especially the prevention of burnout, is also needed. Some basic suggestions from researchers (Gould, Udry, Tuffey, Loehr, 1996) include:

• Teach young athletes and parents how to manage stress.

• Keep travel time down.

• Do not overuse "playing up" (younger athletes competing against older athletes).

• Players should have some input in training.

• Use positive reinforcement instead of criticism.

• Set goals that are realistic.

It is difficult for parents to let go and allow a coach to do her/his job. The coaches are there, however, to help and guide youngsters through the sport. Done right, coaches can help build self-respect in the youth on a team. Martens and Seefeldt (1979) gave these suggestions for parents:

• During the game, stay seated in the bleachers.

• Do not yell to the children about how to play or about what they are doing wrong.

• Comments to young athletes, parents of opposing team, officials, or league administrators should not be derogatory.

• During the game, do not interrupt what the coach is telling the athletes. Parents must be willing to give up the responsibility of their children to the coach during the game.

• Coaches and parents can prevent burnout by working together in youth sport. Youngsters will be able to develop self-respect in a positive sport environment.

Youth Sports: A Negative Impact?

Today’s Youth and Sports

Some of my greatest life experiences came on the athletic fields and courts. While participating in three high school sports I was fortunate to have been a letter winner in all three and earn a college scholarship to play baseball. Now, after playing and coaching youth sports for over thirty-four years, I have mixed feeling about the benefits of youth sports given the current conditions that surrounds our young athletes. As a high school athlete in the mid 1970’s, I witnessed very little negative parent involvement during athletic events. Football, basketball and baseball all had three month seasons and we did not have to travel for five hours to play a team in a tournament that shared the field with us during practice. I could not have imagined playing 70 baseball games in two months. Good grief. Professional baseball players do not have to play that many games in that time period!

So what’s happening in youth sports? As a parent, are you beginning to wonder if allowing your child to participate is worth the time, energy and dollars? This article focuses on some of the real issues that sports psychologist have researching since the early 1980’s.

In 1986, Alfie Kohn published a book entitled, No Contest: The Case Against Competition. Kohl’s book, which is research based, argues that competition is “poisoning us” and “that our struggle to defeat each other-at work, at school, at play and at home- turns us all into losers.” Kohl’s opening chapter supplies the reader with these words:

“Life for us has become an endless succession of contest. From the moment the alarm clock rings until sleep overtakes us again, from the time that we are toddlers until the day we die, we are busy struggling to outdo other. This is our posture at work and at school, on the playing field and back at home. It is the common denominator of American life.”

For some, Kohl’s word may be extreme, but for others his words hit home. A current article printed by the National Association of Sport Officials, list over 100 reports sent to them annually (since the mid ‘90’s) of extreme fan, parents and youth aggressive behavior that involved assaults, obscenities, threats, hate crimes and more acts of a growing violence in youth sports. Numerous youth sport and official associations throughout the country are claiming to have a difficult time securing coaches and officials due to the current atmosphere in youth sports.

If you are a parent or a fan of youth sports, visit the “Youth Sports & Psychology” section of ScottCounseling.com for more sports psychology and sports mental health information.