Homework Battles: End The Fight At Home

Click: Is Homework A Battle at Your Home???

ScottCounseling recognizes that helping children do homework can be a battle. Most parents agree that some homework is necessary and appropriate for their child to do in order to succeed academically. Many parents, however, struggle with this one question:

Homework: What is the Parent’s Role?

To answer this question, ScottCounseling is here to help you explore and develop a parenting homework philosophy. Without a parenting homework philosophy or a developed belief system in regards to this topic, you may find yourself floating at sea with no predictable hope of reaching a destination. ScottCounseling is tossing you a lifeline. Let’s get started!

Tough Questions

Is Homework Important?

Yes! Many educators will share with you that homework is important because it helps the student practice what they have learned in class that particular day. They will also share with you that homework, done properly, will allow the student to have a better chance to score well on a test or successfully complete an assigned project. These are the obvious answers to our first question. Here are some other thoughts to consider regarding the value of homework:

• Homework teaches time management. Children who are assigned homework are often given a specific time to start and end a task. This helps children to learn how to meet deadlines and plan ahead.

• Homework teaches responsibility. Children who are held accountable at an early age to complete age appropriate task learn to become comfortable with responsibility.

• Homework teaches determination. Children who become determined and self-motivated are more likely to stay and complete a task. This often leads a child to character traits.

Homework builds character. Allowing your child to take responsibility for doing chores, setting goals, sharing feelings, asking question and yes, doing his or her own homework, builds and shapes character and personality. Homework provides your child with a chance to succeed and fail. Personal character is built by having an opportunity to succeed and/or fail. By the way, failure is not bad. Failure gives us another opportunity to SUCCEED! Once a child succeeds, he or she develops become encouraged. This encouragement leads to the development of your child’s positive self-esteem.

Who’s Responsible For The Homework?

Ultimately, the child is responsible for his or her homework. When parents assume ownership of homework, children will most often allow, and then become dependent, on the parent to do most of their assigned work. This same dependency may develop with chores, time management, activities and other areas that are important in a child’s overall development.

What Are My Parenting Responsibilities?

Depending on the age, grade and learning ability level of your child, homework parenting responsibilities will vary. Most teachers, at every grade level, are willing to help parents answer this question. ScottCounseling offers the following suggestion for parent homework involvement:

• Before school begins, hold a discussion with your child and come up with a homework plan. Unless you child has special education needs, your child should be able to do the following:

1. Communicate with you on a daily basis regarding what they learned, enjoyed or experience in school that day. Tell your child that you are going to ask specific questions: “I see that you were doing division in math today. (As a parent you know this because you checked the Website or the weekly course list.) Can you show me an example of what you learned?”
2. Share with your child that you are not going interfere with homework unless he or she asks for help.
3. Help your child to set up a study place or area. Let the child decorate, put together supplies etc.
4. Let your child know that his or her teachers do not support the playing of TV’s, Ipods, phones or other distractions in school while doing school work and “we want to have the same study atmosphere in our home.”
5. Let your child know that you will be communicating with his or her teachers, or visiting the teachers’ websites every now and then.

• Parents should attend their child’s school open house at the beginning of the school year. Teachers and other staff members often make recommendation for parent involvement with their child’s homework assignments. At this meeting, teachers often share e-mail addresses, phone and voicemail numbers and other communication methods for parents to utilize to assist their child.

• Parents should be aware of daily and weekly homework assignments. Assignments may be in your child’s planner, posted on a teacher’s webpage or available via e-mail. MOST TEACHERS DO NOT AND SHOULD NOT BE CALLING YOU OR PERSONALLY SENDING YOU DAILY HOMEWORK ASSIGNMENTS UNLESS YOUR CHILD HAS SPECIAL NEEDS AND ON AN INDIVIDUAL EDUCATION PLAN (I.E.P.).

• Communication with teachers via e-mail, school website, voicemail and conferences are important for parents to gain access to your child’s current grades and academic performance. BFORE YOU COMMUNICATE WITH THE TEACHER, IT’S IMPORTANT THAT YOU COMMUNICATE WITH YOUR CHILD.

• Be patient! School and learning is a process not an event. Part of all learning is learning how to cope with the struggle. Know when to call it quits for homework. If you and the child are continually frustrated, contact your child’s teacher.

What Type Of Homework Parent Am I?

Permissive Parent

· Permissive parents seldom discuss school with their children.

· The permissive parent lets the child regulate most homework and school assignments on his or her own.

· This parent does not usually get involved in school conferences, communicating with teachers or attending school functions with their child.

· This parent assumes the teachers or school will help the child become academically successful.

Autocratic Parent

· The parent is in control of school and homework.

· The parent hovers over the child, checks scores daily and does not trust the child.

· The parent constantly makes negative comments toward the child regarding his or her academic progress.

· Autocratic parents may actually do some of his or her child’s homework

· Children are not allowed to make homework decisions without parent input.

· The autocratic parent often uses threats to motivate the student to complete homework assignments.

Authoritative Parent

• The authoritative parent allows and expects the child to team with the parent and share ideas in setting up a homework plan.

• This parent has clear set expectations for the child and shares these expectations.

• The authoritative parent does not want the child to fail, but realizes that failure is an important part of education.

• This parent uses discipline (natural consequences such as no TV until homework is done, or a friend can sleep over when I see your school report that all missing work is turned in) , rather than punishment (mean to cause pain, hurt), to help the child who does not do homework.

• The authoritative parent is aware of how the school operates, is comfortable speaking with teachers and provides input when necessary.

The Homework Handbook Great Homework Book!